I am pathetic

ketika puluhan lembar duit biru bergambar I Gusti Ngurah Rai itu ada di tangan saya...
mendadak stress saya hilang...

oh christ, why am I still alive? I am already a clockwork. not human. no. where's my flesh and blood? it's gone? no no no? no I can hear no music no more? what has happened all this time?
money! aaa.. moneeeeeeyyyyyyy!!!!!!

help!!! it's scary! really REALLY scary!!! this is not me!!!